(no subject)

Attempted to saute something for self for Shabbat dinner. Started impressive pyrotechnic display before getting to the "something" part of "saute something". Nearly burned apartment down. Woke all neighbors and dead with smoke detector for over five minutes. Am now microwaving an Amy's meal for Shabbat dinner to eat by myself. Hate kitchens, cooking, and food more than ever.

Still not sure what went wrong.